I am currently re-reading a favorite book of mine, "The Four Agreements" by Ruiz.  I've pondered posting these four agreements with regards to discussion boards of ALL sorts, so now I will!

"Be Impeccable With Your Word" whereas "impeccable" means "without sin" so... say what you mean, mean what you say, and be respectful!  No gossip.  No putting others down... it only reflects badly on YOU.

"Don't Make Assumptions" so if you don't KNOW something to be true, or you find yourself ASSUMING something will be true based on your vast life experience... or lack thereof... ASK questions until you are clear.  There ARE times when asking some questions in "this" world will be in appropriate or taken the wrong way, but in reality... we all have the right to ask any question we want, AND we all have the right to say "yes" or "no" to answering that question, and it can be done in a polite way.   Remember that to ASSUME is to make an ASS out of U and ME.  (That IS how I remember how to spell that word!)

"Don't Take Anything Personally"  Of course I understand that no one on this board "ever" does this (ha ha ha!!).  No really, I "get" that THIS one would be, is, and will always be a challenge for most people!!!  But the way this book describes it (correct me if I am wrong, anyone who knows this stuff better than me... I won't take it personally, I promise!) WHEN you take things personally you are generally making an ASSUMPTION that what they said was actually ABOUT you when the reality is that it is about THEM.  THEY had an idea things would be different than they were, or THEY are having a bad day at work or at home and (wow!) here's a chance to "vent" on a board...anonymously!! Whoo Hoo!  Who knows even who "they" are?  Unless you ASSUUUUUUME you are actually knowing the people behind the aliases on this board just because you read it and based on your vast life experience...well I think you get the point.  For more info...the book is short and readily available.  

Finally, number four, "Do Your Best" and give others the benefit of the doubt that they are also "doing their best" on every given day.  But if the lady or gentleman you are meeting has just  gotten a bad phone call or really is insecure about themselves... why make it worse?  Give them the benefit of the doubt that they are doing their best, and also do YOUR best to make the best of the situation you ARE in (as opposed to the one you had built up in your mind, or wanted to be in, or expected to be in, or whatever other illusion of perfection you may be desiring at the moment.

See?  SIMPLE!

All my best...as always....

XO

Wendy